INDIGO BABY

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Posted by INDIGO on May 8, '10 8:43 AM for everyone

This was sent to me a few months before I gave birth to Benny and I read it again a few days after I gave birth and was in tears. No need for more words, I am sure you all can relate. Much love to us wonderful wild women!

Happy Yummymummies Day!!

We are beautiful inside and out!
We matter and count without a doubt!

xoxo,

yummymummy denise

Being a Mom

We are sitting at lunch one day when my daughter casually mentions
that she and her husband are thinking of "starting a family."

"We're taking a survey," she says half-joking. "Do you think I should have
a baby?"

"It will change your life," I say, carefully keeping my tone neutral.

"I know," she says, "no more sleeping in on weekends, no more
spontaneous vacations."

But that is not what I meant at all. I look at my daughter, trying to decide what to tell her. I want her to know what she will never learn in childbirth classes.

I want to tell her that the physical wounds of child bearing will
heal, but becoming a mother will leave her with an emotional wound so raw that she will forever be vulnerable.

I consider warning her that she will never again read a newspaper
without asking, "What if that had been MY child?" That every plane crash, every house fire will haunt her. That when she sees pictures of starving children, she will wonder if anything could be worse than watching your child die.

I look at her carefully manicured nails and stylish suit and think that no matter how sophisticated she is, becoming a mother will reduce her to
the primitive level of a bear protecting her cub. That an urgent call
of "Mom!" will cause her to drop a soufflé or her best crystal without a moment's hesitation.

I feel that I should warn her that no matter how many years she has invested in her career, she will be professionally derailed by motherhood.

She might arrange for childcare, but one day she will be going into an important business meeting and she will think of her baby's sweet smell. She will have to use every ounce of discipline to keep from running home, just to make sure her baby is all right.

I want my daughter to know that every day decisions will no longer be routine. That a five year old boy's desire to go to the men's room rather than the women's at McDonald's will become a major dilemma. That right there, in the midst of clattering trays and screaming children, issues of independence and gender identity will be weighed against the prospect
that a child molester be lurking in that restroom.

However decisive she may be at the office, she will second-guess herself constantly as a mother.

Looking at my attractive daughter, I want to assure her that eventually she will shed the pounds of pregnancy, but she will never feel the same about herself. That her life, now so important, will be of less value to her once she has a child. That she would give herself up in a moment to save her offspring, but will also begin to hope for more years, not to accomplish her own dreams, but to watch her child accomplish theirs.

I want her to k now that a cesarean scar or shiny stretch marks
will become badges of honor.

My daughter's relationship with her husband will change, but not in the way she thinks. I wish she could understand how much more you can love a man who is careful to powder the baby or who never hesitates to play with his child. I think she should know that she will fall in love with him again for reasons she would now find very unromantic.

I wish my daughter could sense the bond she will feel with women throughout history who have tried to stop war, prejudice and drunk driving.

I want to describe to my daughter the exhilaration of seeing your child learn to ride a bike. I want to capture for her the belly laugh of a baby who is touching the soft fur of a dog or cat for the first time.

TRY NOT TO CRY....

I want her to taste the joy that is so real it actually hurts.

My daughter's quizzical look makes me realize that tears have formed in my eyes. "You'll never regret it," I finally say. Then I reached across the table, squeezed my daughter's hand and offered a silent prayer for her, and for me, and for all the mere mortal women who stumble their way into this most wonderful of callings.

Please share this with a Mom that you know or all of your girlfriends who may someday be Moms. May you always have in your arms the one who is in your heart.

MANY SWEET KISSES AND WARM COZY HUGS TO ALL OF US, MOTHERS, TITAS, SISTERS AND FRIENDS!

xoxo

Some endearing quotes that I've collected and keep close to my heart:

My mom is a neverending song in my heart of comfort, happiness, and being. I may sometimes forget the words but I always remember the tune.
~Graycie Harmon

I love my mother as the trees love water and sunshine - she helps me grow, prosper, and reach great heights.
~Terri Guillemets

A mother's arms are made of tenderness and children sleep soundly in them.

~Victor Hugo

Mother love is the fuel that enables a normal human being to do the impossible.
~Marion C. Garretty, quoted in A Little Spoonful of Chicken Soup for the Mother's Soul

Hundreds of dewdrops to greet the dawn,
Hundreds of bees in the purple clover,
Hundreds of butterflies on the lawn,
But only one mother the wide world over.
~George Cooper

A mother's happiness is like a beacon, lighting up the future but reflected also on the past in the guise of fond memories. ~Honoré de Balzac

It's not easy being a mother. If it were easy, fathers would do it.
~From the television show The Golden Girls
--

A man loves his sweetheart the most, his wife the best, but his mother the longest.
~Irish Proverb

The best conversations with mothers always take place in silence, when only the heart speaks. ~Carrie Latet

Tags: mom, mothers, being

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10 CommentsChronological Reverse Threaded

zhanne8 wrote on May 8, '10

hi! can i copy this to my facebook?

smoochypoo wrote on May 8, '10

This is very touching. I tried to hold back the tears as hard as I could. Thank you for sharing it. I, too, would like to share this beautiful piece and touch the hearts of not only mothers but also sons, daughters and moms and dads-to-be.